No…this is not a new culinary delight; this is what happened to me the other day at lunch…really. It was after I played tennis in my indoor tennis league in Jericho. Several of the women enjoy lunch together at a local coffee shop. We all get along, and the conversation is always interesting.
So that day, instead of having my “regular” quiche, salad, and iced tea special, I ordered a BLT on whole wheat with mayonnaise on the side. Reasonable…right? I thought so!
Well, the service was not exactly the best that day. The place was pretty crowded; lots of women and even a few tables filled with men. When the waitress finally headed our way, carrying five plates at a time (how do they do that?), I was hungry and ready! The woman opposite me got her huge Caesar salad with chicken on top; the one next to her got her grilled cheese with (very, very crisp) bacon on top; and three other women were served various and sundry salads. Now it was my turn! As the waitress approached my corner of the table, she kind of bumped into something – or just took a tiny misstep – and the plate carrying my BLT, etc. kind of jiggled in the air. She actually caught it, but on the way the small round container of mayonnaise (on the side) flipped out…and landed – BOOM! – right into my pocketbook, which was hanging on the side of my chair! Let me clarify that: it landed right into the little pocket in my pocketbook which holds my cell phone! No mayonnaise got anywhere else but IN and SURROUNDING my cell phone!
“Oh My Gosh!” said the waitress and everyone else at the table, including me! I grabbed for my phone, pulled it out of my bag, and it was covered from head to toe – or screen to keyboard – in white, gooey mayonnaise! The waitress was extremely upset, and I felt bad for her, so I tried to remain cool. She ran and got me a towelette to wipe it down with…and so I wiped it down. I kept saying, “It’s ok…it’s ok…it’ll be fine!” And actually…it was!
And so I leave you with two simple warnings: 1) Make sure your pocketbook is zipped close when you are at a restaurant, and 2) Never order mayonnaise on the side!